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Sal’s Best Lines in Impractical Jokers

Did you know that Sal has two lines in the intro sequence of the show? That’s one extra compared to the rest jokers. So what does that tell us?

One, that Sal has a treasure trove of memorable quotes and that two, he’s mighty good with the delivery provided he’s not feeling overly sensitive and can hold himself up. Whichever the case, his psych up routine is all part of the charm.

Here’s a collection of some of his best lines across the seasons and their source episodes for your viewing pleasure.

Sal’s Best Lines and the Episodes in which He says them

Prepare for something amazing!Season 2 Episode 9 (Psychotic Not-Line)
Shut your face, Grandma!Season 1 Episode 7 (Out of TP)
Season 2 Episode 23 (Enter the Dragons)
Season 4 Episode 18 (Blind Justice)
I will never forgive you!Season 2 Episode 16 (Down in the Dump)
Let’s get sexy! Let’s get sexy!Season 1 Episode 13 (Charity Case)
Welcome to White Castle, bitch.Season 1 Episode 9 (A Loser Presents)
Bingo!Season 3 Episode 29 (B-I-N-G-O)
Who wants a good old fashioned f**king?Season 4 Episode 18 (Blind Justice)
I put my hand in your shirt, I put my hand in your shirtSeason 3 Episode 10 (Snow Way Out)
You want to let them titties go before you start to blow.Season 1 Episode 12 (Bellydancer)
Get your meaty paws off my DVR mom!
Don’t stop letting people not help.Season 5 Episode 2 (You’re Cut Off)
What? Ah hell no! Hold up. Huh? Oh okay.Season 3 Episode 18 (Baggage Shame)
I voted for cactus, but nobody cares what this old lesbian thinks.Season 6 Episode 3 (The Parent Trap)
Hey Laura, those are NICE PANTS!Season 3 Episode 5 (Bonus Footage)
OH MY GOD! It’s Carrie Underwood. She’s my favorite! … It’s Rihanna. My favorite. NICE PANTS!Season 5 Episode 1 (HellCopter)
And she get’s turnt … And she got that thing where one tiddy bigger than the other tiddy. And she show me.Season 5 Episode 9 (Brother of the Sisterhood)
Hang me in front of my friends because I have a funny thing I want to do with my legs.
Whole grain bread? You dirty dog.Season 2 Episode 23 (Enter the Dragons)
I gotta take a mondo duke.Season 5 Episode 7 (Putting the P in Pool)
God bless.Too many to list!

Do you have some more lines? Share them with the rest of us in the comments. Meanwhile, you may also want to check some of Joe’s best lines.


(im)practical binger

An Impractical Jokers' aficionado that's always up for a roundish avocado.

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